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The Red Cup staff reveals its Masters Champions Dinner menu

Yeah, none of us are ever winning the Masters

Golf: Drive, Chip & Putt National Finals Rob Schumacher-USA TODAY Sports

We’re taking a brief break from Ole Miss and taking in Masters week here as one of the greatest traditions in sports.

Augusta National Golf Club and its members don’t give a collective crap about what we think about its traditions, which might be why they are so damn great. In fact, I believe that’s generally what makes traditions great - doing what you want and not giving a damn what others think of it.

With that, the annual tradition of the Masters Champions Dinner comes into frame. This is a post the Cup has done year in and year out, but let’s review. The previous year’s Masters champion sets the menu for all past Masters winners in a Tuesday dinner for the ages. It’s an opportunity to maybe showcase your country of origin with some unique dishes. Or maybe even a chance to say “hey, I’m the youngest guy in the room by a decade, eat a burger, fries and milkshake” like Tiger Woods in his first Masters win.

The 2021 Masters champ Hideki Matsuyama released his dinner menu Tuesday with a lot of Japanese inspired cuisine. Not gonna lie, I’d absolutely crush this meal.

In another tradition, the staff at Red Cup compiles its ideas for a Masters Champions Dinner in the never going to happen scenario one of us won the Masters. Quite literally, no one on this staff would break 100 at Augusta on our best day - just an absolute bunch of embarrassing hacks.

But, we love food and booze, and also some of these orders would just demolish the field with some digestive issues the next day.

Ghost of Jay Cutler - A large pile of rice.

One Man to Beat - Starting it out with a smoked sausage and cheese plate and a main course of fried catfish, turnip greens and Rotel cheese fries. Dessert is a broken milkshake machine from McDonald’s they promised was 100 percent working when they delivered it.

Ruby Draayer - Prime rib with all the fixings and a triple berry pie for ‘Merica.

Gray Hardison - Everyone places a Popeyes order, and then 15-20 minutes later when the box is handed to them, they find out what they’re actually eating.

Justin Lewis - I would be tempted to hit them with Donald Trump’s White House meal of champions, but ultimately I ride with hot wings. Everyone would be treated to some Honey Gold and Lemon Pepper wings catered by the Wing Guru with a special appearance of banana pudding from Central BBQ.

Juco All American - Taco Bell Mexican pizzas.

So what would you serve up to all the previous champions of the Masters? Comment below with your food and booze takes.