Well, we’re halfway through the Week 2 buildup, and already this whole college football 18-wheeler has veered dangerously off toward the shoulder of the interstate. Not a total disaster, yet — Alabama rocked FSU and the rest of the country to sleep on Saturday — at least if you reside outside the city limits of College Station, Texas.
We’re in a hurricane week! Games are being moved and postponed! I live in Charleston! I might float off into the sea! And then here comes Hurricane Jose! EVERYTHING IS FINE!!!
Anyway, Wednesday Matt Luke held a presser and coachspoke his way through some pretty banal answers regarding injuries and offense and football-adjacent stuff. Qaadir Sheppard is back practicing. D.D. Bowie needs surgery on his thumb. Other things were said, but they’re not interesting enough to include here. We’re the internet’s premier interesting blog, after all.
Nick Saban also held a press conference and he said just as less. One reporter noted that Saby Baby is set to make $11 million this year and asked the coach if he thinks he’s worth it. Answer: “probably not.” My guy, ask anyone attached to this Alabama team and you’re worth five times that much. Let’s all have a pint of turpentine.
What else happened here? ... Florida is playing their game, Miami is moving, FAU is sticking with their scheduled game at Wisconsin, and the College of Charleston will likely shut down for the foreseeable future until these stupid storms hammer us into 1812. Oh here’s a fun tweet from a South Carolina beat man:
Muschamp on Drew Lock: He can make all the throws. "He's got a Sunday arm." Also praises Mizzou's ass-catching talent.— Tod Palmer (@todpalmer) September 6, 2017
We at Red Cup Rebellion Dot Com The Website have the utmost respect for Tod (with one D) Palmer, because he has not and will not delete this tweet. May the “ass-catching” live on forever. ASS-CATCHING WIDEOUTS. OLE MISS GOT PLENTY OF THAT, AMIRITE, NCAA?!
Oh, did we say “NCAA?” Matt Luke is going to glamorous Covington, Kent. to sit down with the Committee on Infractions on Monday. That should be fun.
Ole Miss remains undefeated in 2017. #SendJimAReviewCopy.
Never change, y’all.