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UPDATE (7:55 p.m. ET): THIS FREAKING THING WORKED. BRYCE HARPER WILL POSSIBLY LEAD OFF A HOTTY TODDY CHEER AT AN OLE MISS FOOTBALL GAME. WE DON’T HAVE DETAILS AS YET, BUT ROSS BJORK ANSWERED ON TWITTER THAT HE WANTS TO MAKE IT HAPPEN. OUR GLAMOROUS, HAPPY BOY WILL SHOUT “ARE YOU READY?” TO HYPE YOU UP FOR AN OLE MISS FOOTBALL EVENT, HOPEFULLY THIS YEAR. WE’RE SCREAMING OUR HEADS OFF AND SHOTGUNNING BEERS AND HONESTLY WE COULDN’T BE HAPPIER. THIS IS THE PINNACLE ACHIEVEMENT OF OUR TIME WRITING ABOUT OLE MISS SPORTS.
. All good here. Let’s make it happen
— Ross Bjork (@RossBjorkAD) September 21, 2017
IT’S GLORIOUS, ISN’T IT? IT’S SUBLIME.
Original post below.
Our oversized, hirsute son, Bryce Harper of the Washington Nationals baseball club, recently sported an Ole Miss football helmet out of solidarity with his good pal and Ole Miss baseball alum Aaron Barrett. We had some good laughs and chuckles of admiration for our brawny, ripped boy, who’s our son.
But that hilarity has since been tempered by a sobering realization. We now need Red Cup Rebellion’s large, adult son to lead off the Hotty Toddy cheer before an Ole Miss football game. A baseball game would cause right field at Swayze to crumble into the earth, and that would really be ideal. But a football game would be so damn fun. Hell, Snoop Dogg led one off back in 2002 or 2003 — possibly before that fateful LSU game — and that was the very zenith of lit. Russell Crowe started off the LSU party last year, in fact.
So, I, Jim Lohmar, managing editor of this little shop, whose very masculine son is Bryce Harper, am officially kicking off a campaign to get athletic director Ross Bjork to invite Bryce Harper to record a video of him screaming “ARE YOU READY?” which will play before kickoff at an Ole Miss football match. Our bat-swinging, beautiful rascal of a son needs to do this. He’s best pals with a former Ole Miss pitcher. He’s a beautiful, hairy man who plays baseball very well, and he’s our darling boy.
ATTN: Ross Bjork. You know what to do.