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Ole Miss fan buys vending machine Barq’s root beer with dollar signed by Houston Nutt

If you have Hootie Dale signed paraphernalia and you want to destroy it, send us the videos.

2017: the summer of Houston Nutt in Oxford. Splendid. We’ve written many words about this crazy doofus this offseason, but we’re far more interested in the dramatic, glorious destruction of various accoutrements bearing his signature. Like those bros that ran over a football with a big ol’ truck. That was fun.

Meet Nelson, an enterprising Ole Miss fan who weathered the Houston Nutt administration in Oxford without somehow exiling himself to Sardis. Nelson here was the proud owner of a US dollar bill signed by the former Rebel frontman, who’s currently suing everyone in existence because they were mean to him on the internet and in real life. This is college football, after all.

Anyway, Nelson has found the best use for one particular artifact of the 2008 spring game. Nelson bought himself a refreshing Barq’s root beer from a vending machine using a dollar signed by THE Hootie Dale. There’s video evidence, and we’ve obtained it by means of [REDACTED].

How did Nelson come by the man’s signature? He was kind enough to email me a quick explainer.

I got the dollar signed back in the 2008 spring game. Nutt was signing stuff in the corner of south end zone and I didn't have anything for him to sign so I just pulled out a dollar bill. He looked at me weird but signed it.

(It’s here we point out that Houston Nutt looks at basically the entire universe weird, but we digress.)

The Rebs went 9-4 in the ‘08 season, finishing No. 14 in the AP poll with a 47-34 win over Texas Tech in the Cotton Bowl. They also whipped the snot out of Mississippi State, 45-0, in Oxford, which is always satisfying. Not bad, and in no way indicative of what would come later.

Please send us more of these videos. They’re what keep the lights running in this shop.