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Houston Nutt performing various activities that are rather complicated

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Our man can’t even recite the Greek alphabet.

LSU v Mississippi Photo by Joe Murphy/Getty Images

Houston Nutt is a buffoon. Your dude can’t even construct a proper BLT, to say nothing of a viable 2011 football season. Houston Nutt belongs among the sewers of ancient Rome, which must have been some truly vile places. YEESH.

Anyhow, Houston Nutt inspires quite a bit of internet humor, not least from this very sports blog, which of course has arrived at something short of complete terms with the Nutt administration in Oxford, but all the while accepting the fact that, yes, that assholery happened and let’s all just move on with our lives. Mercy.

Houston Dale Nutt failed to win an SEC game in 2011, and for that alone he deserves every whit of your scorn. Houston Dale Nutt coaxed Jeremiah Masoli out of Oregon and made him something of a passable college football quarterback before, well, um, huh.

Houston Dale Nutt developed out the Wildcat offensive attack at Arkansas, of course, probably because he couldn’t coach a passing game to save the Titanic. His defenses were notoriously awful, and his commentary at CBS is utterly forgettable. He’s suing the University of Mississippi and its athletics foundation for damages on embarrassment grounds, notwithstanding the embarrassment of losing by double digits to Vanderbilt in 2011. But anyway, we digress.

We’re here to talk about Houston Nutt failing at various academic, intellectual tasks. Houston has shall we say a way with words, and many times those words fall short of their semantic work. Further still, he probably struggles with difficult recital situations like this one:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

Or this:

This exercise of course spirals upward and outward for eternity, seeing as Houston Dale Nutt’s fumbling illiteracy with literally everything does so always already. There’s no end to Houston Nutt stumbling about with simple, literacy-centered jobs, and for that reason he won two games in 2011 and promptly got shitcanned by Ole Miss. Then he compelled Hugh Freeze’s resignation.

Houston Nutt can’t even spell “resignation.”