clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

SEC Tournament Opening Round Open Thread

Getty Images

The SEC Men's Basketball Tournament begins today in the Big Easy! If you can't be there, well, join the party. We'd love to be in the New Orleans Arena this afternoon, half-tipsy off of a few Sazeracs and satiated by a belly full of fried oysters, with discarded plastic jewelry draped over our necks as we lazily watch the Ole Miss Rebels shockingly lose to take on the Auburn Tigers in the opening round, but we won't be. We'll be, like most of you, at work.

Sucks, right? Well, worry not, because you can do the third or fourth next best thing and join us as we discuss the goings on of the tournament live here at Red Cup Rebellion. We'll be in-and-out throughout the afternoon, but we'll do our best to keep you updated with scores and general observations in today's open thread.

The schedule for the goings on of today, March the 8th, are as follows (all times are CST):

NOON - LSU will take on Arkansas in the tournament's opening round.

12:48 PM - LSU head coach Trent Johnson will be ejected for shaking a referee while calling him a "shitmouth piece of shitbag shit."

2:15 PM - During pregame warmups, Anthony Grant's death stare will frighten approximately 2,000 fans out of the New Orleans arena. The fire department will be called. They'll show up two hours later.

2:30 PM - Alabama will take on South Carolina in what is certain to be a dominating performance by the Crimson Tide. We'll have our fingers crossed that they lose because we're spiteful people like that. Such makes being a sports fan exciting, y'all.

4:48 PM - Despite not having a reservation or, really, any idea where he is, the scent of french fries will lure Renardo Sidney into the front door of John Besh's Lüke. Upon threats of strangulation, the fry cook obliges to Sidney's demands. He will also stuff a few live lobsters, a crab, and a few fistfuls of oysters into his backpack. He'll then use the men's restroom without flushing afterwards. He's really an uncouth individual.

5:23 PM - Having been caught in some construction traffic just after I-55 merges with I-10, the Rebel basketball team, hauled in a van borrowed from Oxford's First Baptist Church (Pete knows a guy who knows a guy), will arrive a few hours behind schedule at the arena. The van carrying their equipment is nowhere to be seen, but sources indicate that the driver took a wrong turn somewhere and is stuck at a truck stop in Hammond.

6:30 PM - Ole Miss will take on Auburn in the 3rd game of the day. It'll be on ESPN3. Watch it and participate in the open thread.

7:37 PM - Just after halftime, Jelan Kendrick will show up dressed out for Auburn. It'll be mad ironic.

8:14 PM - Rick Stansbury will, at this point, have lost everything in his wallet at a Harrah's blackjack table. He'll convince himself, and the Mississippi State administration, that he's a damn fine card player, thank you very much, and demand more money to keep playing. The BuLlDaWg administration will give it to him.

9:00 PM - Mississippi State will take on Georgia. DAWG DAWG DAWG MISSPELLED CANINES ARE EVERYWHERE!