Once again, it's summertime. Fireworks, cold beer, smoky barbecue, and bikinis define the time. We're having fun, and we would like you to as well. While our Autumn weekends will be engulfed in the conflagration of college football fandom, those of our Summer will be fun and varied. As such, we Cuppers would like to share with you our Summer weekend plans, along with the weekend plans of a few others of note, in order to hopefully give you ideas as to enjoyably bide your time until kickoff.
First of all.... song of the weekend.
The Rolling Stones - Let's Spend the Night Together
Dan Mullen - offering a bunch of players that Southern Miss hasn't even offered.... he has to win the in-state recruiting battle somehow, right?
Patrick Patterson - KEEPIN IT REAL, NOXUBEE COUNTY STYLE, BAYBAY. Yeah, good for you.
Cleveland Cavaliers Fans - who?
Ghost of Jay Cutler - Tacking a year on, breaking a hip, and keeping a glass of water by the bed in which to keep his dentures
The One That Got Away - hopefully not unexpectedly making two horrible blog posts like he did a few months ago. STAY AWAY! WE ONLY KEEP YOU ON THE LIST SO THAT WE CAN MAKE FUN OF YOU!
Juco - playing a commie sport all weekend, being out of shape, and probably throwing up; Also foaming at the mouth in preparation of NCAA 2011's release
Other people who have XBox live - crying because of the impending doom they can sense already
One Man To Beat - Working for some extra $crilla for football season. Bourbon bucks. Dewar's dollars. Or hiring a Stripper-Gram for Juco to help him forget about NCAA 2011 for 30 seconds.
Ivory - Volunteering at a camp in Wiggins, MS for mentally handicapped kids. Berating fellow bloggers for the lack of charity.
Dan Mullen - FUN VACATION IN WIGGINS!!!
Houston Nutt - GRACELAND BABY, WOOO, I BET ELVIS WOULD'VE BROUGHT THE WOOD, BUCKLE UP DEM CHINSTRAPS CATFISH BANANA PEANUT BUTTER SAMMICH FRY IT UP BABY WOOO
Lane Kiffin - Accusing Derek Dooley of illegally recruiting current USC players. But here's the twist : this time, he's recruiting them for al Quaeda.
Da'Rick Rogers - Helping little old ladies across the streets of Knoxville, then pushing them back into traffic. Baking for a church potluck and hiding razor blades and glass in his cupcakes. Trifling with hospital birth certificates and putting apostrophes in fucking ridiculous places.