clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Stack-Ups: Everyone Has An Opinion Edition

New, 3 comments

About what does everyone have an opinion?  Which coaches are good coaches and which coaches really suck.  Okay, sure, Les Miles is crazy.  So is Houston Nutt.  Nick Saban is slicker than Exxon the Seal, and Bobby Petrino makes Nick Saban look like a boring New England rector.  And of course, Gene Chizik is a terrible new coach at traditionally good program, and Dan Mullen is an allegedly good new coach at a traditionally terrible program.

Opinions abound.  The statistical probability that anyone will agree with mine ... low, very low.

You know everything about these coaches.  I'm not telling you anything new.

ALABAMA

If the State of Alabama taxed mentions of Nick Saban in Yellowhammer State newspapers, they could erect a bullet train from Bryant-Denney Stadium to Talladega Superspeedway for easy and opulent transport of rednecks.

AUBURN

Wouldn't it be some funny shit if Auburn beats Alabama this year?

ARKANSAS

Everyone has the Razorbacks as the surprise team in the West in 2009.  Here's a surprise for you:  Bobby Petrino is a douche.

LSU

There has not been in all of history such a combination of jaw, haberdashery, and crazy in one person since Magellan put his hat on one of those big Polynesian faces for a nice "round-the-world" souvenier.

STATE

Dan Mullen looks like a pear.

OLE MISS

What legitimately crazy thing has Houston Nutt done since moving to Mississippi?  Such is scientific proof that there's syphilis in the water in Arkansas.

Think any of that is funny?  I don't care.  Think what follows is completely illegitimate:

ALABAMA'S Nick Saban

OLE MISS Houston Nutt

ARKANSAS Bobby Petrino

LSU Les Miles

STATE's Dan Mullen

AUBURN's Gene Chizik.