For yet another offseason, it is summertime. Fireworks, cold beer, smoky barbecue, and bikinis define the time. We're having fun, and we would like you to as well. While our Autumn weekends will be engulfed in the conflagration of college football fandom, those of our Summer will be fun and varied. As such, we Cuppers would like to share with you our Summer weekend plans, along with the weekend plans of a few others of note, in order to hopefully give you ideas as to enjoyably bide your time until kickoff. This weekend's theme song? Some trippy-ass Mr. Rogers Remix that Juco found. Just watch it.
People that Ghost is Jealous of - Bonaroo
The Belomont Stakes - I'LL HAVE ANOTHER (tragically disappointing ending to the chase for the Triple Crown)
Jelan Kendrick - Having an aggressive staring contest with his unwilling fellow Taco Bell employees.
Houston Nutt - Seein' if my boy Jolly Kookooclock can hook me up with those loco Doritos tacos I've been hearing Shibest rave about.
Ryan Buchanan - Getting way too much glowing correspondence from people with pseudonyms like "Are_Hugh_Ready62."
Everyone at The Library - Is Ryan Buchanan in town? If, yes, proceed to contributing to the delinquency of a minor.
Neal McCready - Hoping he has time between tweets about the OKC Thunder to get up and go to the bathroom because the pressure is on.
Hugh Freeze - traveling to New York for the MS Picnic in Central Park, listening to lots of Billy Joel in preparation.
Mexter- He'll be watching Germany-Portugal and Spain-Italy this weekend. That's about it.
Germany - Taking out the frustrations of a post-military defeatist identity crisis by proving to their once-enemies that they're certainly capable of winning in something. In this case, that something is sport. Sound familiar?
Ghost - I'm going to Boston. I'm looking forward to eating Dunkin' Donuts and being an asshole to strangers. I will also be looking to Dawgsports for bullshit offseason post ideas to shamelessly rip off this weekend.
Tanner Mathis - Being a badass. Keeping his chain showing outta his unbuttoned jersey.
Alex Yarbrough - Gettin' paid.
Juco All-American - Drinkin', smokin' (a pork belly), and listenin' to Bluegrass.