Glorious Commisar (283x365) (via twoyardsandacloudofenricky)
By Minister Scott Stricklin
People's University is proudly to announcement Championship Season 2011 for People's University Bulldog Football Squadron. With end of season official-made evening last in City of New Orleans, such a time as this it becomes necessary for People's University to admittance success of season for all to behold!
"Offer was made to compete for Capitalist Bowl Series of Champions," Commissar Mullen forcefully declared, "but having won Championship in November last, such a football squadron as Ours found it of necessity to turn down invitation, allowing lesser squadrons from Alabama and Louisiana to compete for faulty trophy."
Indeed, as all farmers-of-book are surely aware, true Championship crown was bestowed upon completion of contest against School of North. So thorough was Championship victory, no further evidence was requisitioned to provide support for football prowess of mighty Bulldog squadron.
"Pleased it makes me to announce tour of Our State with trophy from Contest of Egg," spoke proudly Premier Mark E. Keenum. "Beginning immediate-forth, Trophy of Egg will appearance at many farms and outposts. The People will freely be allowanced to touch Trophy, that it might invigorate feelings of pride in Our State Championship and reinforce ideals of agrarian lifestyle."
While preparation-making for tour has been under contemplation, School of North has, in lowly fashion, resulted to Capitalist scheming to attempt to steal-make Championship of 2012. Many recruits have been purchased with illicit monies. In effort to sway pure-minded future Book-Farmers, rumor-mongers from School of North insistence that Glorious Commisar Mullen will departure make for State of William Penn School. As further evidence of sad nature of School of North, in season next, coach hugh freeze will be motivationed to win by monetary rewards. Such despicable behavior is surely to be expected of Capitalists to North, but Commisar Mullen urges all loyal Book-Farmers to make known in their provinces that such misguided actions should be condemned.
In effort to do such as this, People's University is proud to announcement series of boards of bill declaring Championship of Football Squadron. Boards of bill urge all youngsters of football disposition to consideration People's University, where Championships are made.