I hate that Gene Chizik, a man who was loathed for his poor coaching in Ames, Iowa, has won a BCS Championship. I hate that Auburn is effectively Mississippi State without the cowbells and with a significant bit more spending money. I hate that Auburn has showed that college football championships can, if circumstances are right, be bought and sold. I hate that, by winning the BCS championship, that Auburn can serve as yet another reminder to we Rebels that, once again, it's really our own crippling ineptitude that holds us back, and not our "history" or lack of desire or effort. I hate Auburn's abuse of a beautiful bird of prey by exploiting the most avian element of its being - it's ability to fly - for the entertainment of a bunch of hayseeds. I hate Toomer's overrated lemondade (disclosure: I've never had Toomer's overrated lemonade).

I do not, however, hate Cam Newton.