FanPost

Having Fun with a bama fan


A thread from Fb that was born from a friend posting a status showing how many days are left ‘til football begins.
Innocent enough, but as usual, the ua supporter opens the door for some fun. The names have been removed (except mine) to protect the innocent (and leave me legally defamation-free).

Status message: ps...38 days

Rebel Fan post: QB or no QB...? I'd rather take our chances without....

My friend: it's a toss up...

Row Tahd fan: ROLL TIDE!

Rebel Fan post: hmmm... thought I heard a toilet flush. Did someone scream "RUN TURD"????

My friend: don't get them started... they come out of the woodworks to defend the tide & the bear

Me: I, for one, despise me some "Tahd" and "The Bay-uh!" Reverent....NOT!

Row Tahd fan: Oh you must of went to ole miss so i wouldnt expect you to be able to read! ROLL TTIDE!

My friend: i think i just threw up a little in my mouth... btw what is a TTIDE?

Me: With all due respect, I went to Ole Miss and therefore I know sentence structure pretty damned well. 

Example of PART of a sentence from an alabama "fan": "Oh you must of went to ole miss..."

What is WRONG with this picture?
1.) Punctuation. Comma follows "Oh," sweetie.
2.)"you must of went..." OMG! What a train wreck! Because I went to Ole Miss and have spoken with enough "tahd" fans, I know what you MEANT to say here. "You must 'have went...'" 

And the caboose closing up this scrap-heap is the improper use of your verb "went." If you had paid attention in those expensive English Grammar classes back in Upper Elementary and Middle School, (and if you hadn't paid your girlfriends to do your homework while you were offering live sacrifices to Satan in exchange for wins from your beloved "tahd") you would know that the correct verb here is "gone." 

SO lets's (just for funzees, I'll let you know what "let's" is. It's a contraction of the words "Let" & "Us." Let's = Let us. BTW...that is Let US...not lettuce, which is a vegetable many sophisticated people eat in a salad as a beginning course to dinner) go over the CORRECT sentence you MEANT to say, but didn't know better because you got that much more desirable education in wherever it is that you hail.

"Oh, you must have gone to Ole Miss so i wouldnt expect you to be able to read!"

Now, THAT'S better isn't it? Just makes more sense and doesn't make you sound like an ignorant, arrogant ua fan.

3.) And finally, "ROLL TTIDE!" Chris has already covered this, so I'll leave it alone. Learn to spell, sugar. {I could have let that slide as sometimes you bummer fans tend to get all excited and stuff when you let your emotions get in the way responding to such a HORRIBLE, WICKED, UNCALLED-FOR attack on your precious "tahd" as the one I leveled. But, If we let things slide, as your English teachers apparently did, we never learn anything.}

Nice meeting you. Hotty Totty!

Row Tahd fan’s witty response: Oh you must of went to ole miss so i wouldnt expect you to be able to read! ROLL TTIDE!

Unexplainable remark posted in real time immediately after her previous post by Row Tahd fan: Oh i dont believe i was speaking to you!

Me: <rests head in hands and weeps> What a retort. I have been slammed. I must hang my head in shame. All glory and honor to the tahd. Row tahd, row.

Row Tahd fan: WHAT AN IDIOT!

They go on > Row Tahd fan: and that time i was speaking to U! THOMAS THE IDIOT THAT WENT TO OLE MISS!

Rebel Fan post: ahhh... football. I've missed you so...

Row Tahd fan: X do you just add anybody to your friend list? i mean where do you meet these people?

Followed by this post without interruption from Row Tahd fan : ive missed you to chris! i promise i'm coming to watch your band sometime! i know yal are awesome!

After some personal banter I’ll edit out, I chimed in: You DO realize: "ive missed you to chris! i promise i'm coming to watch your band sometime! i know yal are awesome!"

"I've," has an apostrophe., as does "Y'all," and "Y'all" has two "L's". It's a contraction for "you all." Yal is the first syllable of a color (known only to ua fans...),"yaller" It is the color of the sun. In the rest of America and most of the English-speaking world, it is known as "Yellow."

And still me: OOPS...Missed one..." ive missed you to chris!" In this context (meaning the usage in this senten....oh, nevermind) "to" should be spelled with an extra "o." We spell it three ways in America. "To" = an article showing place. "Two" = the mathematical number. "Too" = also, or in addition to.

Row Tahd fan: THERE IS MED FOR PEOPLE LIKE U! HOPE U FIND THE HELP U SO NEED

This post is a Red Cup Rebellion FanPost. Please don't sue us.

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