John Daly & Houston Nutt paired in St. Jude Classic

Yes, it's happening. 

***

Houston Nutt arrives at the St. Jude Classic in usual rare form, stepping all hibbity dibbity down the cart path. John Daly throws a Marlboro Red and coinciding smoked turkey leg to the ground and lets out his usual hungover roar.

Daly: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! PIG SOOIE RAZORBACK!!!!!

Nutt: Hey brother, long time no see.

Daly: Yeah, I've been passed out since the night you BEAT #1 LSU WITH THE DAMN ARKANSAS RAZORBACKS!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Nutt: Hey, Hey, giggity, I hate to interrupt, but um, I'm no longer coaching there, brother.

Daly: Well, damn, where'd you go?

Nutt: I'm at Ole Miss now, giggity.

Daly: Well, Hotty Toddy, gosh almighty, when's Ole Miss gonna beat somebody!?!?! HAHA!!! *cough* *cough* Damn, my caddy told me that one. He also told me to quit smoking and drinking whiskey. What an asshole right?

Nutt: *nodding with a chuckle* So, what're you doing at this whole charity deal? 

Daly: Oh, hell, it's judge ordered. Apparently, buying hot wings for Make-A-Wish kids at Hooter's doesn't count as "community service." What about you?

Nutt: I'm just dodging the recruiting trail, because God knows that I'm no good at it, giggity goo.

Daly: Hell yeah, I know what you mean. So how's that whole Ole Miss thing going?

Nutt: I got some good boys on the team last year, and we whupped Florida down in the Swamp and made it to the Cotton Bowl and embarrassed Texas Tech. We used a motto to bring the team together...we said we had to have "One Heartbeat."

Daly: Man, my doctor says I've barely got one of those left in the old ticker.

Nutt: You're only 43.

Daly: Yeah, but my life long motto has been NICOTINE, PROTEIN AND CAFFEINE. WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! PIG SOOIE RAZORBACK!!!! One pack of the cancer sticks per round, a breakfast of porterhouse steak and eggs with cheese and a two liter of diet coke per hole. 

Nutt: Well, this oughta be an interesting 18 holes. 

Daly: HA, THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! PIG SOOIE RAZORBACK!!! HAHA!! *cough* *cough*

The unlikely pair bops and waddles off into the sunrise across the dew strewn blades of grass at the St. Jude Classic towards the first tee box.