Jamariey Atterberry's DUI

by The Ghost of Jay Cutler on May 5, 2008 1:21 PM EDT

Jamariey Atterberry, a member of the Legion of Oddly Named Rebel Defensive Backs (LONRDBzors), was recently dismissed from the Rebel football team following an arrest for gettin' dranked and subsequently piloting a motor carriage. This arrest comes within a couple weeks of Allen Walker's arrest of the same nature (and RotW prize!) and marks the third arrest under Houston Nutt's tenure.

First it was Jamarca Sanford gettin' arrested in front of NightTown Billiards, then it was Allen Walker gettin' towe-up and drivin', and now it's Atterberry... Well, I guess Coach O was right, he really was putting together a defense of WiLd BoYs!1!1!_+~~

I finally found a reason to use this!!

All of this rabble-rousey and hooliganism has really made me question why these young gents feel the need to drive after drinking. Is it because they're unaware of the consequences? Is it because they're too confident in their drunken driving abilities? Is it because they're too prideful to use the Rebel Ride?

My guess: all of the above, with emphasis on the latter.

A lot of kiddos on campus just think they're too cool to ride the wonderous Rebel Ride, a free service provided by a student run committee designed to keep drunk Ole Miss Rebels out of their cars after a long (partying until midnight is "long," right?) nights of drinking on the Square. While not the coolest thing on earth, Rebel Ride is free, safe, and sometimes the most entertaining 20 minutes you'll have for weeks on end. One can meet new friends, initiate an eventually regrettable hookup, or have one's pelvis crushed all by this magic carpet ride masquerading as a free bus.

Why let your pride stand in the way of that? Of course, this aversion towards Rebel Ride isn't exclusive to Oxford. These fine young rappers out of the Metro Atlanta area known as the SWD Drum Majors express the almost exclusively American cultural taboo of public transportation in their ~~hit~~ poorly put together rap song, "Bitch you Ride the MARTA Bus."